It’s hard to listen to your body sometimes … 

Your body is always trying to communicate with you – letting you know if it’s feeling tired, or hungry, or stressed, or thirsty, or drawn to something or someone, or has had enough of something or someone.

The mind-body connection is a feedback loop that sends you up to date information about your mental, emotional and physical state. But are you listening to it??

There are lots of reasons why we soldier on – and actual necessity is only one of the reasons we push ourselves beyond the limit – things are always urgent, but our minds can make it feel that way.

That’s why taking time to rest and look after yourself by knowing when to stop can trigger feelings of guilt and selfishness. Not helpful and definitely not kind.

I’ve just been to visit a friend who’s dealing with a heap of health issues following an operation that went wrong. She hasn’t been able to work for the last couple of months and isn’t allowed to work for a few months more. For an extravert, that’s like being put in solitary confinement, so I took her some homemade spanakopita for lunch – a combo of nourishing food plus a bit of company and TLC.

Despite the fact that she’s exhausted and weak, she just can’t let herself rest. Perish the thought! She’s been cleaning out drawers and taking stuff to the op shop, making chutney, and finding it hard to do very little, which is actually what her body needs.

There are times when I wonder whether I’m a big baby, because I’m not very good at ‘soldiering on’ and ‘pushing through’ and all the other things that grownups are meant to do, no matter how tired or stuck or sick you feel.

I try to practise what I preach about self-care and not burning out and being kind to yourself. In fact, I probably do err on the side of being overly lenient with myself – I take a break when I’m feeling tired or keep hitting my head against a brick wall. 

The other week, a friend from the UK was coming to stay for a week, and on my list was to vacuum and wash the floors before she arrived. The weather was wet and I knew they’d be clean for all of 10 minutes before Clancy covered them with damp grubby footprints. 😒

So I decided not wash the floors – shock, horror! – and I didn’t let myself feel bad about not staying up late the night before to do them, because what I needed more than clean floors was a good night’s sleep.

We were so happy to see each other after so long, and so engrossed in our conversations, that I doubt she noticed the state of the floors. Actually, she probably did notice (she’s a clean freak), but that’s not my problem – I can live with it!

It’s challenging to stare down the guilt and instead tune in to what your body is telling you, and then act on it. But it’s a skill that can be learned with practice, like any other new skill or habit.

So, I’m suggesting that you take it on as a challenge – just for 3 days, can you pay attention to your body and what it needs, and then do that? In other words, try to be a bit kinder to yourself and see what you notice … Less stressed? More rested? More stable energy and performance? Better moods?

If you’ve got any hints for how to deal with guilt, then I’d love to hear about it!